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National Service

2009-01-15T22:45:00.007+08:00

You know, I really sympathize with people meeting with mishaps while serving national service. We had seen like 4 major ones reported in The Straits Times since 2008? Of course there are other incidents that I am sure were not reported but never mind.

I hate National Service. When I started BMT, I thought, "yes we must defend our country! My life for Singapore!" As time went by and I spent most of it doing nothing, feeling stupid and last but not least waiting, my opinion changed drastically of course.

After reading about the latest incident(the storeman one), I got annoyed enough to type this post.

According to the newspaper report, so-and-so Sergeant Major said duty personnel can go to rest at 5pm or something like that, so therefore the person is not considered working when the accident happened. I mean seriously, most of the things are so messed up in the army I have even worked from 7am to 12 midnight before. So if I get knocked down by a rover at 12 midnight they are not going to pay for my hospital bill? Of course there was this other statement from the other guy that the storemen were ordered to work from 8am to 6pm, which obviously is the truth.

Then we have the incidents of people running and dying suddenly. We have to come to accept the fact that not everyone is physically-able. Not everyone is like LOOK-AT-ME-I-AM-SO-MANLY-I-CAN-RUN-FOREVER-AND-NOT-SLEEP. Everyone is genetically different. In the reports that I have read(if I recall correctly), most of these incidents happen despite stringent safety guidelines which include most importantly SEVEN HOURS OF SLEEP. In my 3 months at BMTC, I am quite sure only less than 7 days out of like maybe 80 days I have 7 hours of sleep.

Now, what is really irking me is that, if you paper pushers want to make guidelines, at least STICK TO THEM. Or admit to the public that your guidelines are NOT BEING FOLLOWED? What is the use of all the nicely printed Arial size 12 black font bullet point safety guidelines Word documents if YOUR GUIDELINES ARE NOT BEING FOLLOWED?

I don't really care if I have 7 hours of sleep, because I know I am fit. How about the 1% of the cohort? At risk of death/accidents all the time?

Oh you know, here is a typical scenario during my BMTC.

11pm : Some guy giving debrief
11.15pm: Go up fight to shower hurry clean stuff brush teeth
12midnight: Fall asleep

5.45am: Wake up brush teeth
6am: Breakfast
6.30am: Area cleaning
7am: Start of first activity

Some guy: "Physical training now.. you guys had seven hours of sleep?"

Everyone starts to count. Even if one does not shower, there isn't 7 hours. Speaking of which, someone in my platoon actually said yes because he clocked 6hr30min(close to 7) of sleep. I never stood anywhere near him again. But thats besides the point.

Everyone: "No?"

Some guy: "Okay good all of you had 7 hours of sleep we can begin."

Okay let's see.. ahh my mind is under attack! Save me someone! No not that phrase! Oh noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo..

Ok this won the battle in my mind. Epitome of retardedness. It had a close battle with "Overly-used statement by witless people who think they are really funny."

Ask ANYONE who went through army whether this happened to them. I know their answers already.

Beliefs in Life

2008-11-23T19:14:00.004+08:00

1) Everyone is fundamentally good and kind at heart. Everyone deserves a chance, help and time. No I don't think I am naive. I am not foolish either.

2) If there is an argument, always trace back to the original cause. If A insults B, B insults A back, C tries to mediate between A and B but D disagrees with C and starts to argue with C... the fault obviously lies with A. I firmly believe that whoever starts the mess should be the one responsible. It is only logical.

3) Never believe that one is totally right. Always find fault with oneself first. I do that all the time. When I get scolded I go through the thought process of what I did wrong. But obviously sometimes I don't get what I did wrong(this is when 1) comes in, the trust and hope that people put in you) but I do go through the thought process. If there is even a possibility that part of the fault belongs to me, I will apologize. I can swear that I do this all the time.

4) Never do low blows. If there is a conflict in perspectives, no matter if you think you are right and you think the person is wrong (because that is probably what the other person is thinking too), never strike a low blow. Suck it in, walk away from it calmly. This is why there is such a thing called "opinions." Not everyone can be of the same mind regarding everything. However, opinions are just opinions. There is no malice in thinking differently from others. If you are arguing with someone, never strike a low blow too. Reason things out. Things will work out. Believe in 1).

Now the question is, why am I putting up this post? I have been in a few arguments recently. If you happen to be reading this, maybe you can execute 1) and tell me what is wrong with my beliefs.

Anyway yeah I know its damn uncool to blog nowadays.. the in thing is writing notes on facebook but oh well..

Presents.

2008-03-25T20:13:00.004+08:00

Well someone said I wasn't updating my blog regularly so here is a new post. Food for thought.

I am not really a present kind of guy - I have almost never gave any presents before and I really don't expect anyone to give me any for my birthday or any other occasion(thanks to those who did anyway). However, many judge the sincerity of the other party by the presents/cards that he/she gives. Which is really ridiculous. Why? That's because anyone can just spend 10 minutes drawing up a very nice card with a touching message for you(http://www.google.com.sg/search?hl=en&q=touching+message&meta=) and spend 100 bucks (money is so immaterial) to get you a wonderful present to sweep you off your feet. However, to treat the other party nicely and help wherever and whenever possible requires much more than 10minutes and an expensive gift. Very much more.

Time and dedication are so under-valued these days.

So damn...

2008-01-04T14:26:00.000+08:00

.. i n f e r i o r

Rant #123128371279

2007-12-28T01:40:00.000+08:00

Okay since I am quite bored and its 1.40am which means I probably won't be able to fall asleep yet.. I shall do a post. Do a post? I think I am too influenced by French and Italian. It is a good thing though.

Subject: DOTA

There are like 1000000 kids playing DOTA seriously. They make comments like "u suck" and "noob!!" after they win the game. I mean, do they really need to say these things? According to my psychology textbook and common sense, this happens when..

1) These people have failed most of the stuff they do in real life. Hence the need to boost their egos and actually feel that they are superior than other people in something. The sense of achievement of winning a dota game is magnified ten-fold for them.

2) They are just immature, regardless of age. I am quite sure there are 20 year olds still doing this sort of thing. Just to get a kick out of doing it.

Besides this, there are other annoying people from DOTA. You can easily tell if someone is adequately-educated.. or not. People who make comments like..

1) "u noob! y didnt u do this and that!"

2) "ur damn stupid cant u tell that will happen?"

I mean seriously, if you're matured and educated enough, you will never call someone else stupid, especially your teammate, in his/her face. Furthermore, these people obviously don't possess team spirit/awareness which enhances my point that they are not educated enough(no projects in lower-tiered schools). I would like to point out that I do know a few great guys who aren't very educated but are very matured and know how to carry themselves.

Oh I am not writing this because something similar happened to me. I am usually too good and pwning people (haha right.. okay I am just not that lousy). Just felt like posting something.

Making plans is futile.

2007-12-12T23:31:00.000+08:00

So we walked into the room all prepared for the french oral exam. We did last minute changes and stuff. The exam started. We started on the prepared conversation. You kept staring into my eyes. I lost track of what I was supposed to say. I had to break eye contact. It felt like I was getting sucked into your world. It was a good feeling.

I will always remember.

Muggerland

2007-11-11T22:25:00.000+08:00

Welcome to NUS. Everyone is so damn competitive. If you slack for even a week, you won't be able to catch up at all. The number of foreigners is really amazing too. I got nothing against most of them but some of them deserve to be shot. Might as well rename NUS to National University of Foreigners actually.

I have decided there is no point being stressed over results. I will just try my best. I think I will probably get average results. I am not really exam-smart(I keep making the wrong choices and doing careless mistakes in exams) and I am so lazy.

Oh yeah I saw this on Friday.

Ok sorry my phone camera is only 3 megapixel(probably lesser) so the quality isn't really good. There are two rainbows side by side. Pretty much sums up my Friday. Cheers.

I resent hope

2007-10-29T01:10:00.000+08:00

Hope leads to short-term happiness and long-term despair.

So don't hope too much. Just enjoy whatever you have.

You would come bouncing up to me and go "heyyyyyyyy" and I would smile at you. We would talk for a bit, make some jokes and share some laughter. This would be good enough for me if we can just do this for the rest of our lives.

Fatigue.

2007-10-26T23:38:00.000+08:00

7-8hrs of sleep with 2 cans of coffee per day but I still feel so lethargic most of the time. I don't know how the cheena muggers can just go on and on and on....

Exams in four weeks. Amazing... so screwed. It is like there is 13 chapters of maths to revise.. lots of programming questions to revise... and tons of 1231x readings.

tired.

Time is running out.

2007-10-16T19:39:00.001+08:00

All I ask is for you to be there when it all ends.

I look at you..

2007-10-06T20:54:00.000+08:00

and I think to myself, "why the heck is life so unfair?" Why do you have everything? You're like the prettiest person I have ever seen in real life and you are like so damn smart. And I found out that you used to be quite good at sports.

I pale vastly in comparison with you in all 3 attributes. It is depressing.

Busy.

2007-10-05T00:07:00.000+08:00

It's a bird. No it's a plane! No it's just my car that just came back. =)

Workload is stacking sky high.

Looks like I will miss another 20minutes tomorrow. Please just give me the 20minutes. It has been so long.

The wait.

2007-09-27T01:31:00.000+08:00

I am not hoping. I believe you will.

In a pensive mood.

2007-09-23T00:39:00.000+08:00

24hrs a day - 10 hours spent sleeping, 8 hours spent slacking/eating and 6 hours spent studying. Not good. I can just imagine the ratio for those "foreign talents" - 8 hours of sleep, 4 hours of slacking/eating and 12 hours of studying. Thats like 2x my studying time. When will I ever achieve that kind of stamina?

I always think that no one should feel inferior to others but in recent times, I changed my mind. It has been so damn long since I actually felt inferior to someone. Well it is a positive feeling. It brings about a desire in me to do better, to stand on the same level as the person. I am really fascinated and attracted to people whom I feel are more intelligent, more elite (but humble) etc etc than me. Maybe.. one day.. I will be on the same level as her..

On the other end, there are some people who are obviously way inferior than most others but they act like they are way superior. Someone needs to wake them up. Like seriously.

Life is complicated.

2007-09-15T19:24:00.000+08:00

This is like a sequel to my below post.

I was feeling so elated yesterday.. then before I went to sleep, I suddenly felt.. so.. wrecked again. I mean.. that was definitely like the one of the highest points of life. I cannot possibly feel any better than that. Then I got struck by this feeling that.. my life can only go downhill since I am at the top now. Such irony. Its so funny.

The chilly wind whipped my both cheeks hard. And the man next to me said ’Everything is gonna be alright’. I said ’Nothing is gonna be alright, but thank you anyway’. And then I saw your face in the airplane window. I waved my hands and I shouted to you:

Untitled

2007-09-14T20:01:00.000+08:00

From the start of the semester till now, I haven't really enjoyed myself in school. Long travelling time, quarrels, homework, really difficult tests etc etc.. week after week of nonsense..

However today for the first time I actually felt DAMN HAPPY(yeah sounds damn childish but wait till your life gets messed up then you will know haha).. like seriously.. not that I was like damn depressed and stuff but today was like.. wow. If the 6 weeks of crap were meant to negate what happened today, it was well worth it.

All the jokes and laughter my god haha. At first I thought it would be hard to click but everything just fell in place. It has been quite some time since I actually REALLY laughed. Most of the time when I laugh it is just that I am trying to entertain the other party actually. I declare it to be the most memorable day of sem1. The most memorable 25 minutes actually.. but oh well it makes up for the whole day.

Car slacksh.. workshop.

2007-09-13T17:22:00.000+08:00

1) They take 2 weeks to get the insurance company to come down to see the car.

2) They take another week to work out a deal with the company.

3) They take 3 weeks to repair and ship stuff.

4) Then they tell me one spare part wasn't shipped over, waiting another week for part to be shipped to SG.

5) So now they tell me the part just arrived. Need another week to fix.

So in total, 8 weeks are being spent to repair a car which suffered NO ENGINE damage. Only gearbox and exterior. I mean I understand no one is expected to work to his best everyday with an average salary.. but 8 weeks is a bit.. RIDICULOUS?

And you know what I am going to tell them after they give me back my car? GO FUCK YOURSELF. Oh there is this wonderful feedback form too. Finally I realize what a feedback form is for.

This is weird I know.

2007-09-10T22:32:00.000+08:00

Okay this is to you, the person who keeps asking whether this post or that post is refering to you. If you are not the person, how about clicking the cross on the top right hand corner of your screen?

I am saying it here because I know you will read this and I think if I just talk about this to you you will just ignore me and might think I am damn irritating etc but.. I just have to say this. As you said you don't like to talk about things, you just want to forget them. But it is like.. if I don't I think things will get worse and I don't really know what you're thinking so yar..

Firstly, I will just do whatever you think I should do ok. You got to tell me in the first place too actually.

Secondly, just don't lie and speak what is on your mind. I mean, I am not going to get angry or whatever at what you are going to say. I can't stop you from lying but what is the point of lying?

Yeah that is all. I think if I say anymore it will be really extreme and over the top then you might really have problems with me haha.

Joke of the year..

2007-09-05T23:07:00.000+08:00

.. goes to yours truly.

I am really foolish. Of all weaknesses to have..

On Character.

2007-09-04T00:01:00.000+08:00

It is okay to be elitist.

Arrogance is fine.

Being selfish at times is normal.

Rudeness? Doesn't matter.

Low self-esteem? No one really cares actually.

You are an introvert? Can be cured.

Attention seeker? Thats your style.

The one common thing in all of the above is.. these people are what they are at face value. No hidden samurai knives. There are only two types of people I cannot stand. First one - hypocrites. It is disgusting.

The second one - people who betray the trust placed in them. That is the absolute WORST thing that a person can do. Most of the time I am not really angry with people no matter what they do.. it is really hard to get my mood down. However, when I find out that someone has betrayed the trust I placed in him/her.. I would really really be disappointed. Like seriously.

If you ever betrayed someone else's trust.. it is better.. to admit.. than wait for the person to find out. It would be less disappointing.

Annoyances.

2007-09-01T23:23:00.000+08:00

1) People trying to get to the door to get off the MRT/bus when it is still 10000000 miles away from the next stop. It is not like you won't be able to get off the train/bus.

2) Modified cars/bikes making a hell lot of noise.

3) People (quite often a specific group of people based on my own experience) talking loudly in the library (a common occurrence in NUS library).

4) People wearing caps in lecture theatre or classroom.

5) Not being able to get to sleep.

6) Not being able to read minds.

Tutorials after tutorials.. omg..

I was hoping

2007-08-27T20:13:00.000+08:00

.. that you would actually do something to salvage this mess.

All the things that I have done for you is worth less than 2 jokes cracked in a friendly and fun way. I just don't get it.

When people make fun of you in a friendly way, no problem. I do the same, wow, a different outcome. Even apologies don't work.

Okay nevermind I should just forget everything. Now the best thing to hope for is for you to do well and get along normally with others.. then hope that I will never ever see you again after this.

Enough.

2007-08-23T23:26:00.000+08:00

I care because..

a. It is mutual.
b. It will be reciprocated.
c. None of the above.

I help because..

a. I got too much time.
b. I get a kick out of helping people.
c. None of the above.

I am always the one making the first move to make up because..

a. I am always and the only one at fault.
b. I got too much time to spare to think of solutions and stuff.
c. None of the above.

I did all I could. What else do you want me to do? Oh yeah most probably if I do anything more you will be blowing your top off at me and I will be there totally bewildered at whats happening. We are just friends like you said so maybe you should just tell me what you want then we won't be having so much problems. It is that simple. Just stop complicating things. Or you can just go on your own path in life with people telling you everything is rosy and fine and saying lots of nice things to you.

A Sinking Feeling

2007-08-13T16:35:00.001+08:00

This is why you should try not to..

1) Drive on the right lane

2) Turn corners at 3rd gear

3) Drive fast on rainy days

And I can't stand all the people who talk about driving fast and all like they are damn pro when they don't even have 10,000km clocked or a car.

The Setup

2007-08-07T01:00:00.000+08:00

Obviously, it was planned meticulously on hindsight.

I can't be bothered about a lot of stuff really, there are bigger worries around, so I just took the bait.

I don't know whether you felt exhilaration or satisfaction but I am sure it was wonderful for you. How about me?

I realized it doesn't really matter to you after what you have told me. All the things that you did. I had faith and trust in you. I always like to see the better side but it was all wrong. Everything is just falling like dominoes.

How could I have misjudged so badly?